• Andrew Chris

Connecting to You Part 1: 4 Reasons to Build a Relationship with Yourself

The relationship we most often neglect is the one we have with ourselves. What do you think about that? Have you ever thought of things in terms of you having a relationship with yourself? When it comes to your personal growth and development, the relationship with yourself is one thing you need to stop neglecting and start focusing on.

So, what is this relationship with yourself? What does it even look like? This internal relationship can be felt in each area of your life. It’s in the way you think, talk to yourself, what you believe about emotions and how you express them, your mindset and approach to life, and how connected to your inner strengths and vision you are. The beliefs you have about your worth and value and what you bring to this world are directly related to this relationship.

You feed or take away from this relationship constantly, which can get confusing at times. To help with that, it’s worth getting to know your Personal Relational Bank Account, which tracks the withdrawals and deposits you make and how this affects the balance. The higher the balance, the stronger your relationship with yourself is, and the reverse is true for a lower balance.

It’s time to stop neglecting the relationship you have with yourself and start empowering your life. No more making withdrawal after withdrawal, it is time to start making deposits and transform your life’s adventure. If it sounds like something you are still on the fence about, here are four reasons to stop neglecting and starting building that inner-relationship!

Reason #1: More Satisfaction in Life

There seems to be a pervasive belief that if we focus on ourselves, we are selfish. That’s not the case unless all you are doing is focusing on yourself and neglecting others in your life. Building a relationship with yourself allows you to be more present and effective in your life and relationships. You bring a positive charge for those around you, attracting more positive energy into your life as you share yours with others.

The more connected you are with yourself, especially your unique strengths, the more confident you will feel when life throws challenges your way. Challenges and struggles will be seen as learning opportunities rather than expressions of your deficiencies or character flaws. Though your challenges won’t necessarily become more manageable, you will still feel more satisfaction in life as you continually grow and express your true self.

Reason #2: Clearer Connection with Your Core Self

The more we depend on other’s approval, the more unhappy we will be and the further we will drift away from our true selves. We will also lose sight of who we are at our core when we continuously criticize, shame, and put ourselves down. Unfortunately, the more disconnected we become from our core self, the more unhappy, depressed, anxious, and negative we can become. Life feels like a constant burden, and we drain our battery and those of anyone around us.

Making the relationship you have with yourself a priority aligns you with your core self. You will connect with your values and vision, and take daily steps that lead you to live more authentically. The need for other’s approval declines as you begin to identify your worth and what you have to offer this world. As you connect with your core self, you will engage your strengths and move towards your goals. Your life will have flow and the energy that lifts you and attracts others into your life.

Reason #3: You’ll Access the Empowered Mindset

When the challenges of life show up and the stress begins to pile up, how do you talk to yourself? Do you encourage yourself and believe you can make it through, or do you start to think there’s nothing that can be done and there is no way you will overcome the circumstance? The way you view situations and your ability to navigate them is connected to your mindset, and your mindset is a direct reflection of the strength or weakness of the relationship you have with yourself.

The lower your balance in your Personal Relational Bank Account, the less likely you are to see opportunities in challenges or the strengths and abilities you bring to the table. Instead, a lower balance leads you to see despair and focus only on what you don’t bring to the situation rather than what you do. Your self-talk reinforces the negativity, leading to a self-fulfilling prophecy that reinforces and feeds the low balance.

Building a relationship with yourself changes the mindset you have in life. As you connect with your strengths, modify your thinking, and start to manage your emotional experience in more constructive ways, you will see challenges as opportunities and temporary. Taking on the Empowered Mindset helps you to see opportunities in challenges. It enables you to implement your strengths as you search for new solutions rather than believing you won’t make it through. You own your life and how you take it on rather than letting situations and discouragement own you!

Reason #4: You’ll be Stronger in Your Relationships

Relationships bring meaning to life, especially when they are uplifting and positive. When you share a connection with someone else that brings fulfillment to both parties, life has a way of going better. We are not meant to be islands; we are made to connect and feel accepted by others and showing this to others in return.

The more connected we are to ourselves, the more present we will be in our relationships. We will show more compassion and empathy towards others while being receptive to those from others as well. You will help lift others and recharge them. You will be open to them, letting them have the room they need to talk and providing the support they need. Also, you will be able to lean on them when you need support.

Caring for yourself will allow you to be there for others. Building a strong relationship within will enable you to create powerful connections with others in your life. Feel the value and meaning that your relationships can bring while sharing that same level of connection and hope with others. Focusing on building the balance with your Personal Relational Bank Account will free you to build up the balances you have in relationships with others. Now that’s a win-win!

Too often, we tear ourselves down, overlook our strengths, and see only our flaws. Doing this leads us to feel further disconnected from our core selves, our lives, and our relationships. It’s time to stop, and it’s time to start building that relationship with yourself. Change the way you treat yourself, and you will change your life!

Part 2 – 6 Ways to Strengthen Your Inner-Relationship


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©2019 by The Life Empowerment Organization LLC.